Leggo my Lembas!

Who needs Lembas? Who doesn't?!? And this informative product commercial explains exactly why. 

Lembas [from Wikipedia]
Appearing in The Lord of the Rings and Silmarillion material, lembas is a special bread made by the Elves, also called waybread in the Common Speech. Shaped into thin cakes, it is very nutritious, stays fresh for months when kept unbroken in its original leaf-wrappings, and is used for sustenance on long journeys. It is tastier than cram or Beorn's honey-cakes. It appears brownish on the outside and cream-coloured on the inside. Lembas is a closely guarded secret, and only on rare occasions is it given to non-Elves. Like other products of the Elves, it is offensive to evil creatures; Gollum outright refuses to eat it, even when starved. Melian, the queen of Doriath, originally held this recipe. Later it was passed to Galadriel and other Elves. Galadriel gives a large store of lembas to the Fellowship of the Ring upon its departure from Lothlórien. Frodo Baggins and Samwise Gamgee subsist on it through the majority of their journey from there into Mordor.

As with cram, Tolkien may have modelled lembas on hardtack, and commentators have noted that lembas has Eucharistic overtones in accordance with Roman Catholic teachings. Lembas literally sustains the hobbits' lives, strength and will, while the Eucharist is the spiritual "Bread of Life". Also, Gollum and other evil creatures cannot abide lembas, while Catholics are instructed not to receive the Eucharist if in the state of mortal sin. Further, the Eucharist is sometimes called viaticum, a Latin term meaning 'for the way,' literally the spiritual food for the Christian's arduous journey through earthly life to heaven. The term viaticum was more commonly heard in Tolkien's day than today. In a private letter, Tolkien acknowledged that lembas bore religious significance.

In Peter Jackson's Lord of the Rings film trilogy, the term "lembas bread" is occasionally used; because the gift of lembas at Lothlórien is not included in the theatrical release of The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (though the scene is included in the "Extended Edition" DVD of that film), the redundant term "lembas bread" was probably chosen in order to immediately identify the substance to filmgoers at the beginning of The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers. In the extended cut of The Fellowship of the Ring Legolas says one bite of lembas "is enough to fill the stomach of a grown man" (while Tolkien says that one whole cake is sufficient for "a full day's march"). Pippin eats four - a reference to the large appetites of hobbits. Lembas is used as a plot device in The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King; Gollum uses crumbs of the remaining waybread to frame Samwise Gamgee for consuming all the rations, contributing to his separation from Frodo Baggins prior to his encounter with Shelob. This sequence does not appear in the novel. In the DVD commentaries, director Peter Jackson notes that the prop lembas used in the trilogy was a sort of unsweetened shortbread.

After searching troll high and hobbit low, here is the best & easiest recipe I could find in all of Middle Earth.

Minutes to Prepare: 15
Minutes to Cook: 15
Number of Servings: 12

Ingredients 

• 2 1/2 cups of flour 
• 1 tablespoon of baking powder 
• 1/4 teaspoon of salt 
• 8 tablespoons of cold butter (1 stick) 
• 1/3 cup of brown sugar 
• 1 teaspoon of cinnamon 
• 1/2 teaspoon maple syrup/honey 2/3 cup of milk/heavy cream (or more, if necessary) 
• 1/2 teaspoon of vanilla

Directions 

1. Preheat oven to 220 degrees Celcius (425 degrees Fahrenheit). 
2. Mix the flour, baking powder and salt into a large bowl. 
3. Add the butter and mix with a fork or a pastry cutter until the mixture resembles fine granules. 
4. Add the sugar and cinnamon, and mix them thoroughly into the mixture. 
5. Add the milk/cream and vanilla and stir them in with a fork until a nice, thick dough forms. 
6. Roll the dough out about 1/2 in thickness. 
7. Cut out 3-inch squares and transfer the dough to a cookie sheet. 
8. Criss-cross (DO NOT cut all the way) each square from corner-to-corner with a knife. 
9. Bake for about 12 minutes or more (depending on the thickness of the bread) until it is set and lightly golden. 

[Recipe from SparkPeople.com, submitted by user PESCETARIAN]

♚ Long May She Reign ♛

I may be a california-born urban faerie, I may be in my 20's, but I could never forsake my British roots.  Today begins the year-long celebration of Queen Elizabeth II's 60th year as monarch of the Commonwealth.  And I for one intend to join in the jubilee.  Regardless of politics, regardless of privilege, I consider The Queen to be an incredible woman and role model.  She has been through challenges most of us can hardly comprehend.  In one year alone (1992), at what in the U.S. would be considered retirement age, she experienced what she has since dubbed her 'annus horribilis' (horrible year).  That was the year her sons Charles and Andrew separated from their wives, her daughter Anne divorced, and a fire wreaked havoc on a portion of Windsor Castle.


Most of us recognize her at a glance.  In fact, any photo of a 'cute white-haired lady with a hat' brings to mind The Queen.  But today I want to touch on just a few of the sweet moments of her life that we seldom see photographs of these days... And I will mention some of my favorite bits about her, per ever-useful and omniscient Wikipedia.

Princess Elizabeth aged 7, 1933 Painting by Philip de László

Elizabeth's only sibling was Princess Margaret, born in 1930. The two princesses were educated at home under the supervision of their mother and their governess, Marion Crawford, who was casually known as "Crawfie". Lessons concentrated on history, language, literature and music. To the dismay of the royal family, in 1950 Crawford published a biography of Elizabeth and Margaret's childhood years entitled The Little Princesses. The book describes Elizabeth's love of horses and dogs, her orderliness, and her attitude of responsibility. Others echoed such observations: Winston Churchill described Elizabeth when she was two as "a character. She has an air of authority and reflectiveness astonishing in an infant." Her cousin Margaret Rhodes described her as "a jolly little girl, but fundamentally sensible and well-behaved."

Under service number 230873 she trained as a mechanic and driver during WWII... love this girl!

At the end of the war in Europe, on Victory in Europe Day, Elizabeth and her sister mingled anonymously with the celebratory crowds in the streets of London. She later said in a rare interview, "we asked my parents if we could go out and see for ourselves. I remember we were terrified of being recognised ... I remember lines of unknown people linking arms and walking down Whitehall, all of us just swept along on a tide of happiness and relief."

As a beaming bride, age 21

The Queen's 4-tiered wedding cake was created by British snack food company McVities & Price and measured 9 feet high and weighed 500 pounds.

Coronation day -- age 27

Prince Charles, sister Anne and a Corgi friend. Photo taken by Queen Elizabeth. 
Photo Credit: Photo News

xoxoxox
God Save The Queen!

my mom, back in the day... more like century

it is no secret that my mom is kinda old.
she is middle-aged, pushing the big 500 and boy is she proud of it
many of our line have lived to be millennials and mum is right on target to make that list.

i decided it would be fun to post some pics of her when the old girl was my age... wide-eyed, eager and full of promise... nothing like me who is bitter, cranky and just needs coffee and craves cake most of the time.

so here she is .... Mlle. Dorothea Fae... for your consideration

mum's gig as a flatware model... the manufacturers loved that she was the same size as the cutlery

mum during her showgirl days, this headdress went straight up... till mum had a run-in with a klieg light

here with her sister, my aunt althea, they had a dance act together. they were called the Papagenettes

couldn't resist throwing this into the mix.... this was my mom when she tried to run away from home as a child.  her wings hadn't come in yet, so she didn't make it more than a block or two from home

my parents while out at a cafe -- no that's not my dad you see next to mum.  dad was off to the left.  the handsome devil on the right was mum's faithful hound, Horatio Hornblower

as you know, my father is of vampire extraction, and as such does not show up in photographs.  that said, this is a pic of my parents while they were courting

here they are pitching woo at a local eatery.  i hear they were notoriously shameless with the pda's

here they are on their honeymoon, in the champagne suite of the Romanoff estate. i think a bellman snapped this pic while they were otherwise engaged and oblivious

this is one of my first memories and fave pics of my mom.  this is how i think of her, getting ready to go to the ballet

mum actually took this picture.  this is the first Mother's Day tea party she hosted for her own mom, my grand-mère josephine

happy Mother's Day mum.... i heart you more every century! ❤

day spahhh

It's been awhile since I've written.
Remember that accidental flood in my office way back when?
Well, the damage was far more extensive than at first reported.
In short, the building ended up being condemned and bulldozed.... yeh

The reason I haven't posted is because I was given some 'time off' from work... more like a time out!  Anyway, no paycheck meant no payments to my ISP, and thus no access to the internet.
While wallowing in self-pity and gelato at home, I decided to do a bit of Spring cleaning and came across an unused Fae Day Spa gift certificate.  The timing could not have been better!
Here are a few snaps from my girls' day out.

Here's my friend Astrid in the waiting area

This place is fabulous.  Each guest gets her own cabana for the day

First off we did the subzero deep freeze experience. There are no words for how shocked my system was.

Next we thawed in these heavenly sun beds

and I splurged for a tanning bed sesh

From there we took teacup naps, a custom my grandmother used to tell me about.  Faeries would snooze in teacups suspended from the limbs of tall trees in order to ensure safety from vicious mythic predators... such as tabby cats.

My aunt Arachnia had her nails done... all of them

Astrid arranged for me to have mine done... ummmmm.... thanks?

And this is what she chose for herself... yep

 even my niece Petunia got a Pixie Pedi

All in all it was a wonderful, relaxing day -- just the thing to get my mind of the office catastrophe.... Swell, I just reminded myself of it again!  Welp, I guess that means it's back to the spah then ;)

have a seat

the superbowl...
i already shared my thoughts with you in anticipation of that all American holiday, the [add booming baritone voice echoing here] THE SUUUUUUPERBOOOOOOWL....

what i didn't realize is that to the guys spectating from the comfort of their domiciles, there is something even more important than the snacks and beer... or score....

the chair

deciding who got to sit where was like a machiavellian musical chairs.... like pieces on a chess board all taking the place per their station.. or more like a king on his throne surrounded by courtiers... or i know... something out of The Godfather... with the don at center stage and the ranks of mafia minions seated according to clout

i was teased to the point of harassment concerning the sort of seating i would prefer.

"hey fairy girl... here's a nice comfy matchbox for you"... i can't even count how many people picked up a mushroom from the crudite platter and offered it to me as "a cute little toadstool... this is what you guys sit on... right?"

grrrrrrrrrrrrr

i've decided to let this blog post set the record straight.
yes there are a number of backwood fairies from the ozarks who sit in chairs like this

but i am an URBAN fairy
this is more what i am accustomed to in the way of tasteful and attractive, yet comfortable and practical seating

this belonged to a local merfamily

this is the aftermath of a prak we pulled on Punzel...
more on that another time

and while walking in the city i have no problem going old school...

and relaxing in a lush pothole

Pothole Gardening by Steven Wheen

Pothole Gardening by Steven Wheen

Pothole Gardening by Steven Wheen

there... curiosity satisfied?
just wait till you get a load of the bathroom fixtures.. now THOSE are bizarre!